blOg~!

Friday, 8 August 2008


life is great

I've decided that the best way to get my feelings out, is by blogging. I don't have to specifically deal with people's opinions on my problems, so I don't end up raging for no reason.

Anyway, I'm sure I'm one of the many people who have really crappy lives. Some learn to deal with it, some don't. I'm kind of half-half. My problems never cease to exist. Sometimes I can deal with it, i forget they exist, and i live life the way i want to: happy. And then there are times where i just can't keep it inside me anymore.

There are ups, and then there are downs. I feel like that sometimes, the downs outweigh the ups.

A simple touch brings all those stupid emotions back. The stupid feelings that made me weak in the first place. The stupid feelings that keep me in a whirlpool of confusion and refuses to let me go, permanently.

No matter how hard i try the feelings always come back, one way or another. I thought i moved on. I thought that time wasn't only flowing around me, but it was flowing within me too. After almost half a year, i thought i was free. For the past few days i've been high and happy, a huge difference to 7-8 months ago, where my world was full of pain and silence for almost 2 years, and then fate takes a wrong step and my old world is back. Well, i guess i should be grateful for that small time of freedom i felt.

Do I have a reason for living? I probably do. I just can't remember what it is anymore.